IRAN: "BOMB US IN MAY!"

HAARETZ:

Iran announced that it will join the "world nuclear club" within a month and will be capable of deterring possible attacks on the country, the Iranian Fars news agency reported on Tuesday.

"No country would even think about attacking Iran after Iran's membership in the club," said Behzad Soltani, deputy head of Iran's Atomic Energy Organization, according to the report.

REPEAT:

"No country would even think about attacking Iran after Iran's membership in the club," said Behzad Soltani, deputy head of Iran's Atomic Energy Organization, according to the report.

OKAY, THEN: START THE COUNTDOWN!

THIS IS WHY THEY WANT THE BOMB: NOT ONLY TO DESTROY ISRAEL, BUT TO PREVENT ANY ATTACK ON IRAN: IT WORKS FOR NORTH KOREA, NO?!

WE HAD BETTER ATTACK THEM BEFORE THIS HAPPENS.

WILL OBAMA!?

NO.

WILL ISRAEL?

YES.

THEN AGAIN: OBAMA MIGHT DO IT IN OCTOBER (IF ISRAEL DOESN'T DO IT BEFORE) - TO TRY TO SALVAGE THE ELECTION. (HE'S GONNA HAVE TO SOMETHING BIG AND UNEXPECTED TO TRY TO HOLD ON TO AT LEAST ONE BODY OF CONGRESS!)

STAY TUNED...