Canada's 21st Century Gold Rush

Well, it's a head-scratcher all right. The 'astonishing' surge of the NDP and the huge popularity of its leader, Jack Layton. Who might have thought this could occur? A former Toronto city councillor and would-be mayor who thought he would challenge for the leadership of the NDP, and here he is, a veteran of four election campaigns, suddenly thrust into the lime-light of beloved-first of voters' preference.

Are those voters thinking 'Prime Minister Jack Layton'? If so they're fairly suggestible, taking up from Jack Layton himself, who has enthused his party sufficiently that they too declare him the future prime minister of Canada, which is how he himself has been proudly proclaiming his intent. Will it come even remotely close to resembling the final results? How likely is that? Are Canadians listening to themselves, let alone the promises issuing from his smiling lips?

Even if this country were as wealthy commensurately as the oil sheikdoms, we would go broke paying for all the hefty and impractical social benefits Jack Layton is promising to rain down on us on May 3rd, when he bashfully makes his plans to move into 24 Sussex Drive. His green-energy agenda should make for very good relations with Ontario's Premier Dalton McGuinty, but theirs is fated to be a short-lived federal-provincial love-in, since Mr. McGuinty appears on his way out of the premiership.

Prime Minister Layton will open the Constitution and re-work it here and there to ensure it presents as compatible with Quebec's aspirations. He is prepared to give Quebec all that it wishes for, and to surprise it for having ushered him into the prime ministership, by giving it even more power, prestige and autonomy by moving Parliament to Quebec City and himself governing the country from that aerie.

Children nationwide will be cared for in government-sponsored-and-funded daycare. Their parents will be freed up to spend their time at unionized jobs that will successfully sue for greater and more generous perquisites, inclusive of a retirement plan that will release them from the stultifying effects of working for a living by the time they reach fifty years of age. There will be hugely-compensated employment for everyone. And for those who simply do not feel like demeaning themselves by applying themselves to working for a living wage, welfare will step in and provide, handsomely.

Health care will no longer present as a problem with long waiting times for surgeries and emergency room hold-ups, for the quality of Canada's universality of medicare will suddenly erupt in a bonanza of perfection paid for by ever-increasing transfers of funds from federal coffers, keeping the Royal Mint ever so busy minting gold coins everyone will clamour for, the precious metal dredged up from the Ottawa River where it has lain unclaimed by anyone for centuries. Canada's pharmaceutical generics will develop a not-for-profit conscience and offer almost-free drugs to those in need.

Finally, Canadians will be able to relax and enjoy life; no stresses, no messes. Thank you, Jack Layton.